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paragonikathryn:

falstafff:

i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.

This is genius

whorville:

thepioden:

hair-old-styles:

harrystyies:

What if oxygen is poisonous and it just takes 75-100 years to kill us?

My science teacher said he thinks that’s true actually

Yeah this is actually pretty much exactly what is going on. It’s why anti-oxidants are such a big deal. Bonus fact: oxygen oxidizes stuff in your cells or, in other words, it’s not toxic, just setting you on fire
very very slowly.

Lmao sure okay

herhmione:

you’re lying if you think minerva mcgonagall didn’t love the marauders to pieces we all know that they were her favorite students we all know she’d let james and sirius get away with little things and let remus off the hook for not having the best quality work the few days around the full moon and make sure peter was always paired up with one of his friends and basically mcgonagall was like the marauder’s extremely strict mother

zealotarchaeologist:

i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”

it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud



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